Parenting & Boogers
My daughter is 4. She’s so god damn adorable.
She delivers her boogers to me.
It’s like… I’m meant to be interested in them.
I almost feel obliged to set up a booger museum. “This booger is from 2013. It’s protected by the national heritage association“.
Initially, I was nice about it… “Oh Thanks, sweety, but mummy has no use for boogers so if we could just throw them away and not bring them to me that’d be great. K. Thanx. Bye“
Then I started ignoring her and just telling her to throw them away herself. Sometimes she would. Sometimes she would cry and make me take the booger.
Now I’m leaning to the “The next Booger you bring me I’m going to chop your nose off” stage of parenting.
There was a couple of incidents where she hand-delivered me a fart…..that was just sickening.
You are probably thinking it’s not possible to hand deliver a fart. Believe me, in those tiny sweaty enclosed hands – Farts are transportable.
Update:
My daughter is now 9. She’s still adorable as hell.
She knows passing boogers are gross and no longer does it.
She still cries if I won’t let her keep ants and bugs as pets.
Parenting. What a job.
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